The difference between surviving and thriving is massive but has less to do with life circumstances and everything to do with how you choose to think about them. Having personally experienced thyroid and prostate cancer with two strokes thrown in for added value I am well acquainted with the challenges that health issues bring. What I have learned and put into practice myself, is that the mind set we bring to life’s vicissitudes is crucial in determining whether we settle for being “a survivor of…[ you can fill the gap]” or go on to fully enjoy our life and thrive.
I have had the privilege of working with people with various forms of physical and mental challenges in their life and without exception the ones who do best are those who approach their situation with an absolute determination to continue to live their life to the fullest. If we see ourselves as victims, then we will be. If we believe that our life is terrible, then that will be true. If we think we are helpless, and everything is hopeless it will become our reality. We can’t always control the challenging and sometimes downright awful things which happen in our lives, but we do have total control over how we choose to think and what we choose to do in the circumstances we then find ourselves.
This is not about using unrealistic positive thinking- which I struggle to believe in myself. I don’t like saying that “everything is ok” when it is not, or “this happened to me for a reason”, though feel free to believe this if it works for you. Rather it is about choosing acceptance that this thing has happened to me and I don’t have to give up and have a miserable or unsatisfactory life because of it. Life remains rich and enjoyable when you allow yourself to engage in it as fully as you can, despite whatever happened to you.
I vividly remember a client who chose thriving rather than surviving after truly horrific experiences as a child. To remind herself of the choice she made, she had the word “Thriving” tattooed on her inner arm to look at whenever she began to falter or doubt her ability to be the best version of herself she could be.
Choosing to be a thriver rather than a survivor is your best path to a life of fulfillment.