How often have you heard someone say, “People today are…” usually followed with some form of negative or disparaging comment. Perhaps you have formed the habit of making the same type of comment yourself.
It is an interesting human trait that we tend to notice and comment on the negative far more than the positive. Perhaps it is caused by that part of our survival mechanism which focusses attention on things we perceive as not quite right, or potentially threatening to us.
While it is useful to notice things that are wrong, it is detrimental to be over vigilant and focus too much on the things we don’t like or disapprove of. If we form a habit of doing this, our connection with the world around us becomes overwhelmed with a flood of negative perceptions. We may become hypervigilant and may experience anger or anxiety at potential slights or affronts to our belief that how we see and do things is the right way.
There is a healthier way we can interact with the world around us. We need to remind ourselves that whilst a particular incident may, in our eyes, be unacceptable, we don’t know that persons story. Were they, in our view, rude and abrupt? Perhaps someone close to them just became seriously ill or died. Are they struggling financially and at the end of their tether? Did they just come from their doctors after receiving devastating health news?
What happens when we try to walk in someone else shoes, is likely to be sore feet. We can only see things the way we see them, not how others see them. However, we can accept that we don’t know what is happening in the life of another and be more aware and tolerant of their behaviour. This doesn’t mean we have to agree with their behaviour, but we can become less judgemental and take more care of our own chosen actions.
We can also remind ourselves that, most people, most of the time, are mostly good. All humans are fallible, including you and I. It is not possible to be perfect, but we can strive to be as good as we can be. Extending this view to our fellow human beings means we can be more patient with what we perceive as errant behaviour. If even some of us do that, our community will become a better place.