It is a new year and many of us will be hoping for something better than the last one. New Year resolutions come and go, often leaving us feeling worse as once again we fail to turn a wish or hope into a reality. What if it didn’t need to be that way? What if we already had enough in our lives to make us truly happy but we just didn’t realise it ?
I remember watching a documentary many years ago about the nature of happiness and it featured a man from the slums of Mumbai. He lived with his wife and family in a shanty made of plastic tarpaulins for a roof and walls and beaten earth on the floor. He proudly related how grateful he was to be fit and strong enough to be able to pull a rickshaw and earn money to pay for food for his family. He showed the camera crew how he could roll up the walls of his house and let the breeze through when it was hot and close it off when the monsoonal rains beat down heavily. He shared how safe he felt living with neighbours who would look after his house and family when he was away working. He was truly happy.
Many people would not understand how someone could be happy with so little, but his perception was that he actually had a lot. It was not that he was ignorant of what else there was in the world, but rather that he did not pine after the things he didn’t have.
Being present and valuing what you have rather than being bitter or resentful about what you have not, is a sure way to have better mental health and well-being. Plenty of people have far more than our friend from the slums of Mumbai, but they are desperately unhappy as they constantly turn their attention to the things that others have, and they do not.
Being present and valuing what you have doesn’t mean that you can’t aspire to improve your situation whatever it might be. What it does mean is that your focus and energy is not overly focussed on this and you give yourself the time to observe, value, enjoy and appreciate what is already in your life.